Diabetes Dreaming - Pump Challenge

I have lots of weird abstract dreams on a daily basis...

Last night I dreamt that my insulin pump came out and  I kept trying to reinsert it and it would go in my skin, but then the tubing would detach. I was flipping out and screaming for help, cause I knew I would die without insulin, however everyone ignored me and wouldn't stop and help me figure out why the tubing was detaching. Finally after about 12 tries of stabbing it in my thigh, side, and stomach and saying I needed to go to the emergency room I inserted it in my inner thigh. I thought it was fixed, but I touched the tube and it fell away
and started gushing blood. Like when they take an iv out and the blood force is so strong it just like sprays in out of a stream from your vein. I thought I was going to die, but John finally came and helped. Kissed away my tears.

I woke up. Didn't fully remember the dream until I was driving into work. I thought it was odd though. I guess I am a little odd. :p

Clusterfuck Cycles

Some days I think I know what I’m doing

Others I’m spinning in circles.

Life’s like a tumultuous wind,

whirling and swirling

And I’m curling my toes in excitement.

Suddenly it’s like I’m standing at the top of a mountain

Higher than the trees and cloud-line.

Waiting for a sign that tells me to leap

And feeling the need to realign.

Because it’s as if I’m jumbled and twisted

My minds a cluster-fuck of emotions.

It’s like I’m trapped in a web, blood to be sucked

Or I’m sinking to the bottom of the ocean.

Sometimes I stand beneath the sun

Hotter than water boiling in a bucket

Overwhelmed by the glowing warmth felt on my face

Maybe someday I’ll just say fuck it…